The Darkness Review

The Darkness Haunted House is located at 1525 S 8th St, St. Louis, MO 63104. General Admission costs $25. In all honesty, they have too many combos for pricing to list them all, so If you enjoy this review, please take a look at the attached link for pricing. You may end up saving some money buy combo tickets.

I’m going to take 2 seconds to explain real quick. Silo X Haunted house is a Sub-haunt of The Darkness located next door on the upper floor that is only accessible Fri.-Wed. With a $5 upgrade to your Ticket to the Darkness. Instead of writing 2 seperate reviews, and seeing as in is a our team visited them back to back, I’ll just write my nightly events in order.

Starting at Silo X, you wait in line for about 25 minutes. I got to see Pumpkin again from my previous visit to a sister location. We met a new guy named Steve. This guy is not, I repeat, NOT PG 13 whatsoever. Most of his jokes revolve around his toilet brush and they are some of the raunchiest things I have ever heard. That’s saying a lot seeing as I view 50 Shades as tame. He discovered some teens in line and disappeared for a bit and we struck up a quick semi conversation with a skeleton wandering the lines. All the sudden Steve runs out the in-door with this small puppet of himself screaming about how he, “found the disney channel!!!”. Everyone in line was laughing hysterically at this point and the teens were BEET red!!! Best line actor I’ve seen in years. Someone give that guy a raise, because he puts in some SERIOUS work!!! We make it upstairs and meet a stilts walking zombie with a tearaway face. It was the fiirst time I had actually seen that gimmick and had to ask politely for him peel his face so I could get a good look. In all honesty, the haunt was very short. It was a quick 5 minutes in and out, and I still think the line acting was the best part. I’d rate it 3 out of 5 stars.

Now, we get to the main attraction. The Darkness takes about 9 minutes to get through the line. You are greeted coming in the door by the orc, Smaug. He is massive and a tad gross, but very polite and provides you with all the haunt rules. The Fates/3 witches warn you of coming danger if you enter, but in the same breath, DARE YOU to continue!!! They leave you with the parting shot that you are most likely going to die. One of the coolest features of this haunt is Medusa and her serpent. You will find many serpentine creatures throughout your travels in this haunt, but this room alone is by far my favorite.There are also a few gators that you pass by that worth taking a second to appreciate. Anyone with a fear of being devoured whole will probably have some trouble getting through the plant room. I’m not spoiling anything and telling you where that scare is gonna come from. I got to see Diablo again, as we saw him at a sister location. He was not happy that we didn’t listen to what he had to say last time we met. One of the last places you will visit is the sewers. Don’t bother holding your breath, you may need it to scream when you discover what’s been hiding down there. This all takes place in about 23 minutes and then there is a shorter second half in 3D. The wait time in line was about 5 minutes for us. It’s pretty much what you’d expect. A lot of clowns, a lot of bright colors. What I didn’t expect was how good the 3D was!!! I have trouble seeing 3D because my eyes keep adjusting everything back onto a 2D plain. In this haunt, I was able to keep the glasses on instead of lifting them on and off which was so nice, I can’t find words to describe how I felt. Hands down the BEST 3D I have ever seen and I HATE 3D, so you know this is really, REALLY good. Again, this was a short half and only took 7 minutes to go through, but I really had a lot of fun. A lot of thought, time and effort went into making this haunt, and you can see that in the placement of props and actors. 4 out of 5 stars guys, well done!!!